I've Finished With Him!!!!!!

I've done it - I've finally finished with him for good!

When GB arrived yesterday, the first thing he did was go and score - so not that bothered about seeing me then. We actually had a nice evening (including a surprisingly mammoth sex session), even though he was doing heroin in front of me, in my house, which I thought was a bit rich. We were supposed to be going out for the day today, but when I woke up he was spark out so I guessed that wouldn't be happening.

I came downstairs to make a cup of tea and saw his phone. It was switched off, which he never does, so I turned it on. A missed call came through from the Lauren girl and so I put the number onto my phone. I checked his messages and there were none there from her, so I knew he'd deleted them, otherwise the ones from last week that I'd read would be there.

Stupidly, I didn't phone her from his phone, I wish I had. I texted her from my phone saying 'if he says we don't have sex he's lying big time. You seeing GB?'. She didn't reply, but I went and told him what I'd done.

He denied everything, but I could tell he was lying. I said if it wasn't true he'd let me phone her from his phone, cos she'd be sure to answer. He wouldn't let me, and had no reason why he wouldn't. So I chucked him out and told him never to come back. The only way he has a chance of ever being with me again is if he doesn't go to work on Monday, which ain't gonna happen.

I then phoned his sister and told her what had happened. She said he'd asked her to look after the dog this weekend. She'd said no and asked him why, he said he had to go to work early! So he said he'd put the dog in kennels. Dunno what he was planning, but he's so stupid, he can't even cover his tracks properly. He knows me and his sister talk.

I've texted Lauren a few times since then, telling her the truth about me and him, because I wish C had done that for me when she found out about me. I don't blame Lauren, I know how he plays people. I also know that he loves me as much as he's ever able to love anyone, so she'll only ever be second best really.

So I'm really not bothered now, I can't believe that the only feeling I have is one of relief. I suppose if things were as they had been before I'd be really upset, but because the heroin had made him no longer the man I fell in love with, I've really lost nothing.

So now it's onwards and upwards. I'm out on a girly night with S, my best friend, tonight. Actually, there's no need to disguise people any more, so S is Sue!

So it's onwards and upwards - and I need to change the title of my blog! All suggestions welcome...