My over-riding concern is that knowing steve has to be in town for the weekend (if only to pick up his methadone) I might be tempted to contact him. Especially since his sister has texted to say she's not heard from him and is worried (what does she expect me to do?). I told her he's probably telling Lauren she's the love of his life and the only one he'd marry by now! But I am worried too, really. So I have taken pre-emptive action.

I'm about to go to the pub for a drunken lunch - this has proven to be a good way to get my mind off things ever since the first love of my life cheated on me with Rita, the Pontyridd bike, at Xmas 1983 (I'm not one top bear a grudge!). I've then got 'Notes on a Scandal' to watch on DVD, I loved the book, so I'm looking forward to that keeping me occupied while I sober up this evening.

Tomorrow is a family barbecue because my sis and her husband are back to Germany next week. We are a very large and boisterous family, so that will keep my mind off things. I shall then be too hungover to pick my head up off the pillow on Sunday.

So that's the plan - I'll let you know how it goes!