Saturday night when we got back from the pub, just when all the Steve 'I'm crap at sex' thing kicked off, he asked me if I had any scissors. I had some nail scissors, and I passed them to him thinking he was going to use them for cutting the tin foil. But no! He started yanking them down his arm really scratching it badly.

I stopped him when I realised, but by that time he said he felt better anyway. He's self-harmed before - a lot deeper that time. It was about this time last year when he was having a bad time getting upset because my ex hadn't moved out yet. I wonder if he gets some kind of reverse Seasonal Affective Disorder, because he was an obsolute nightmare last summer.

But what can I do, especially when he's so far away?

I never thought I'd say this, but I wish he'd come back here. I don't understand why he wants to be in that rainy godforsaken pit of boredom!