Last night Steve didn't phone, and when I phoned at just gone midnight his phone was going straight to answerphone. Now I was worried, because in my head he'd been run over because he'd been cycling back from Windermere out of his head on heroin, with no lights. But then I thought about it rationally, and realised he was probably in his room, which has no reception at all.
This is where I departed from my usual response - or rather the way I got used to responding. When we first met I was pretty laid back about things, but as time went on, he got into so many scrapes that I would assume the worst as soon as he didn't call, would bombard him with phonecalls and texts trying to get a response, and would then bollock him when he did call.
Last night I texted him 'I assume you got back ok. Or have been run over and phone broke.' Then I made myself forget about it entirely. So much so that when he phoned me this morning about 11, I had forgotten my annoyance when he hadn't phoned, and was my usual self. Consequently we had a really nice conversation about what I'd been doing and he'd been doing - he said he'd not gone to score but had gone back to his room and got drunk then fallen asleep. I don't know if that's true and I don't need to. But I do know that he sounded a lot more laid back today, so I suspect he did score, but that's by the by.
He phoned me again about 3, and again was really loving. I'm feeling so happy today, and I know that in a way I'm being irrational, but what's that saying about is it better to be right or better to be happy? I'm enjoying being happy and I don't want to think too much about if I'm doing the right thing.
