I've just been reading Lucrezia's blog and her description of how we change along with others' perceptions of us clicked something with me. I like the person I am with Steve. I'm carefree, funny, happy, loving, YOUNG - as young as I always felt inside but was never able to express without it being subtley sat on by my ex. With Steve I can skip through service stations, I can kiss in the street until we're told to 'get a room', I can swing on the death slide with my little boy hanging off my leg, I can sit outside pubs with my son scribbling at my feet, I can be a 'bad' mum, a sexy girlfriend, my own person, and I like it!

I also feel a better person around him. The ex used ot tell me what I wasn't good enough at. Steve tells me what I'm too good at - 'you shouldn't be so quick to forgive people' (bet he's change dhis tune on that one now!), 'you shouldn't always give people money', 'you deserve better than me', 'you're a really good mum, ignore them' (when me and my friends got berated by another 'friend' for sitting outside the pub in the garden with our kids).

It's only when he has a go at me that my self-esteem takes a hit, and that is comparatively rare compared to how well we get on most of the time, and how happy I am when I'm with him.